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Post by Erika Delicia Danielles on Sept 6, 2013 12:39:29 GMT -6
"Sierra-chan, you're too formal!" Erika chastised pleasantly. "Relax! I promise it's really difficult to offend me!" she assured her. "Sierra-chan, we have to go to the aquarium together then! You simply must see them! They're amazing!"
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Post by Noa Clarke/Sierra Forrester on Sept 6, 2013 12:43:09 GMT -6
Too formal? Well, maybe. She'd have to watch that, so she'd have an easier time fitting in, instead of standing out as an overly polite woman, which might not work. She gave a nod, "Yeah, sure," she said, "I'd like that."
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Post by Erika Delicia Danielles on Sept 6, 2013 12:59:19 GMT -6
Erika brightened. She really did like going to the aquarium, especially with other people. "Then we'll definitely have to pick a day! So what brings you here?" she asked cheerfully. Sierra seemed unnaturally polite and a bit tense. She wondered if something was on her mind.
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Post by Noa Clarke/Sierra Forrester on Sept 6, 2013 13:06:29 GMT -6
"Just to drink," she said, looking back out the window, "To get a drink and watch as life goes by."
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Post by Erika Delicia Danielles on Sept 6, 2013 13:22:28 GMT -6
Watch as life goes by? Erika new the feeling. At many points she always felt...so passive. She didn't really have her own dreams. She wanted to help her father and protect her little brother. And now that she'd awaken as a blue mage save as many people as possible. That last part sounded active but was it? She wanted to preserve their hopes and dreams, their ambitions. She wasn't even quite sure what she really wanted for herself.
"Do you like watching or would you rather be doing?" As much as she looked after her family and others, she supposed she was doing. She was the one to get her drunk father up in the morning or tired father when he was sober. She did all of the shopping. She made sure Jun was in good shape with his college applications and S.A.T.s and all that. She tidied the house. She did all the cooking. She filled out all of her father's tax filing papers. And she did all her Maigraner work too. But it was more watching, wasn't it? More safeguarding the happiness of others.
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Post by Noa Clarke/Sierra Forrester on Sept 6, 2013 13:26:47 GMT -6
"Both," she said. "But sometimes you have to step back from living your life to watch another life," she told Erika, "Sometimes you don't want your life to go on as it is, and sometimes you almost wish you could have another's, or see how someone else lives. That's how I feel about it, anyway."
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Post by Erika Delicia Danielles on Sept 6, 2013 15:25:19 GMT -6
Erika tightened her grip on her cup and her smile faltered for just an instant. Step backing from living your own life? Live another life? See how someone else lives theirs? She'd be lying if she didn't have such thoughts. She was constantly plagued by them. She tried to repress them as much as possible but they couldn't help but trickle through.
She loved having the power to protect others. She really did. But it was a huge responsibility. And it meant at times that she had to kill. Even if people insisted they were monsters from Hades or whatever it didn't matter. They were still sentient. They still had hopes and ambitions and she ended that. Praying for the peace of their souls, leaving behind a flower, and crying didn't make up for what she did. She always regretted that she couldn't save them, couldn't reform their cruel tendencies. But it was a fact she had to accept, had to live with every day.
And her visions. She always hated them. They had the power to prevent great disasters and catastrophes but she didn't want all these terrible images filling up her head. And with her crystal ball she was now more responsible than ever. Without it she couldn't control her premonitions. They just came to her and she was forced to do the best she could with that. But now she had the ability to probe into the future whenever she wanted/needed. And how much was enough? She still didn't know. She hated using the crystal ball. It always made her feel so drained and she saw such horrible things. But she needed it to protect people.
And she had all these dark visions; but, she hadn't seen her mother's murder coming! She couldn't do anything to warn her or protect her. Then her father completely lost it and now she was responsible for holding the family together. So yeah. She knew what it was like to want a different life.
And her dad was having a relapse again. He was drinking too much. Erika was doing what she could; but, her powers were limited.
Her smile reflexively flicked back into place and she loosened her grip on the cup. She wasn't sure what to say. She was worried her voice would betray her so she simply smiled.
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Post by Noa Clarke/Sierra Forrester on Sept 6, 2013 16:46:15 GMT -6
Sierra regarded her in silence for a bit, "Are you ok?" she asked, just a bit surprised by the other girl's silence. She figured it was a fine thing to ask, and if she was ok and there was nothing wrong, great, then she'd just brush off the question as nothing of importance and go on. But if there was something wrong, then she'd know and be able to do something.
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Post by Erika Delicia Danielles on Sept 6, 2013 16:54:59 GMT -6
The dreaded question. She really did hate to worry people. She was probably only asking out of politeness anyway. Still, she was really really not okay. It had been a terrible day and she was exhausted and at her wits end and...But that was not this person's problem.
"You don't need to be so polite," she decided to answer. She wasn't in the lying mood. She really didn't want to say she was okay. But being honest was somewhat unthinkable.
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Post by Noa Clarke/Sierra Forrester on Sept 6, 2013 17:03:17 GMT -6
"I'm just trying to be helpful," she said. She didn't see politeness and helpfulness as the same thing. She wanted to ask again, but she didn't, she'd leave it at that.
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Post by Erika Delicia Danielles on Sept 6, 2013 17:08:28 GMT -6
Erika brightened. "Thank you, Sierra-chan! I appreciate it! That's really sweet!" She stirred her coffee with a straw. "But it would be gloomy and troublesome. I'm sure you'd much rather talk about other things! Um...What about you? Are you okay? You seem kind of tense?"
Hopefully that should take care of it. Good old misdirection. She was honest and so hopefully would not appear rude; but, she had hopefully switched the topic back to Sierra.
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Post by Noa Clarke/Sierra Forrester on Sept 6, 2013 17:16:03 GMT -6
"I'm fine," she said, "Thank you for asking, but I'm fine." And she was; thoughts of home and her future were far off, right now she was only thinking of the present, and what was to come for now.
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Post by Erika Delicia Danielles on Sept 6, 2013 17:19:54 GMT -6
Erika's smile brightened. "I'm fine too! Living, breathing, and functioning," she said cheerfully. It wasn't a lie in that context. Fine was such a lose term. She was living, breathing, and functioning even if just barely at the moment.
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Post by Noa Clarke/Sierra Forrester on Sept 6, 2013 17:22:38 GMT -6
Sierra nodded, not entirely sure how to take that comment, "Good, glad to hear that," she said.
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Post by Erika Delicia Danielles on Sept 6, 2013 17:26:18 GMT -6
Hold it together. Hide everything behind a smile. Don't make people worry. Put them at ease.
She extracted her phone. "Sierra-chan, can I have your number? It's a crime that you haven't seen an aquarium! One I intend to correct!" she said in a bubbly voice.
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